[MA-SOC] fan-dating and dating meet-ups at cons

Ralph Young ralphyoung at optonline.net
Mon Jan 15 21:08:06 EST 2007

I think a meetup is a worthy idea but ultimately it will end up with a badly 
skewed male-female ratio; once you factor out the recent influx of 
way-too-young girls the conventiongoer demographic leans to the male, and 
that leaning gets more pronounced the older you go.

Ironically, since my last post this afternoon I went out on and returned 
from a first date with someone new, a perfectly charming young woman I met 
on New Years' Eve.  The date started off well but I could feel her lose 
interest at some point over dinner, no reason I can identify. Despite her 
comments to the contrary I'm not expecting to hear from her again.  In 
itself, not that bad; but I've noticed a trend of fizzling first dates since 
I returned to the dating pool in September.

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Zoh" <metasomatic at gmail.com>
To: "Metro Anime New York City--social list" <ma-nyc-soc at lists.baka.org>
Sent: Monday, January 15, 2007 5:15 PM
Subject: [MA-SOC] fan-dating and dating meet-ups at cons

> On 1/15/07, Mandisa Washington <mandisaw at earthlink.net> wrote:
>> Might try just working on talking to women like people, and listen to the
>> stuff she/we say(s) like you actually care. We pretty much work on the 
>> same
>> basic principles as guys in the initial meeting & talking stages. Once
>> you're through that part, it's all about charm and sincerity *grin*.
>> (Sondheim describes the difference between the two admirably and 
>> humorously
>> in the two princes from "Into the Woods", rent it, love it...)
> I agree with Mandisa, I think the best way to meet people for dating
> purposes is just to make friends with a bunch of people of your
> preferred gender. Try to think of ways that your interests overlap.
> Then you can do those activities and sincerely enjoy them, and other
> people will notice you enjoying them (which is attractive). In the
> case of otaku guys, usually talking to girls as friends is good
> practice. And if you can get your friends to introduce you to *their*
> friends, etc., dating chances are generally much better than if you
> just amble up to someone at a convention without any prior history or
> connection.
> I've been thinking that I would really like to hold a "21+ meet up" or
> something like that at a bar nearby the convention center one of the
> nights of Katsucon. Not specifically for purposes of dating, but just
> because it'd be nice to meet some folks in my age range, and whom I
> *could* think about dating without wondering if it were legal (cough).
> What do people think about this idea? Would you attend something like
> that at a con if it were properly organized and fun?
> Zoh
>> Mandisa
>> > [Original Message]
>> > From: Ofer Hirsch Gill <oferhirsch.gill at gmail.com>
>> > To: Metro Anime New York City--social list <ma-nyc-soc at lists.baka.org>
>> > Date: 1/15/2007 11:12:23 AM
>> > Subject: [MA-SOC] Train-man...,WAS Re:  Most important decision of my
>> 2007 gaming (Warcraft)
>> >
>> > Another Otaku lost to Warcarft. (Putting hat over my chest in 
>> > mourning.) I
>> > could be next, but I'd rather pursue other avenues in life... I miss
>> having
>> > a girlfriend. I don't recall the last time I dated. It must've been too
>> > long. If I can know a woman the same way I've gotten to know my brand 
>> > new
>> > Nintendo Wii, I'd be far better off in life.
>> >
>> > For those of you males lucky enough to date Otaku females, I'd like to
>> hear
>> > how you pulled it off. (It'd be nice to date a woman with some sort of
>> > overlaps with my own hobbies.) I fear dying alone if I do nothing but 
>> > go
>> to
>> > work in the day, and do otakuish stuff at home by night. (Did I mention
>> that
>> > there are almost no females in the office where I work?) I'm also still
>> > bitter about that poorly organized Dating workshop I attended at the 
>> > last
>> > Otakon, but I've ranted enough about that back in September.
>> >
>> > So one and all... Tell me your Otaku dating stories. I feel like I'm
>> > becoming the next Train-Man here, though I'm sure other Otakus are
>> > interested in hearing about this too. How did you pull it off? (Don't 
>> > tell
>> > me you saved her from a bum on the train, anbd the rest was history...)
>> >
>> > - Ofer
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